The REAL 10 Commandments

   One thing to be grateful for in this insane election cycle is the lack of babbling from conservative religious nuts about the Ten Commandments. These prattling prigs have turned the commandments into a fetish, worshiping statues and paintings reportedly depicting the commandments, rather than, say, actually obeying them. The funny thing is that the Hebrew Bible (and PLEASE don’t call it “The Old Testament.” It is the Hebrew Bible, even though the pagan christians stole it to give their religion some credibility), I say, the Hebrew Bible contains 613 Commandments. What’s even funnier is that the 10 commandments these dolts always bleat on and on about… are the wrong ten commandments! There is only one place in the bible where the commandments as such are called “The Ten Commandments” and that is in Exodus 34:28 Here they are:

I. Thou shalt worship no other god.

II. Thou shalt make thee no molten gods.

III. The feast of unleavened bread thou shalt keep.

IV. Six days thou shalt work, but on the seventh day thou shalt rest.

V. Thou shalt observe the feast of weeks, of the first fruits of wheat harvest, and the feast of ingathering at the year’s end.

VI. Thrice in the year shall all your men children appear before the Lord God.

VII. Thou shalt not offer the blood of my sacrifice with leaven.

VIII. Neither shall the sacrifice of the feast of the passover be left unto the morning.

IX. The first of the firstfruits of thy land thou shalt bring unto the house of the LORD thy God.

X. Thou shalt not seethe a kid [ie, a young goat] in his mother’s milk.

  As you can plainly see, these are not the commandments that the holier-than-thou religious nuts claim to follow. I’m sure they don’t even know about the REAL Ten Commandments… because in my experience, almost none of them have ever read the book which they want to force down your throat… I suggest that they spend less time on the Ten Commandments and put in a little more study of the Bill of Rights.

  For more on these ignorant bible-thumping hypocrites, look at THIS PAGE on my website (and sign the guestbook so you can say hello to me)


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